Tuesday, December 8, 2009
Cosmo Quiz
Be humbled through submission,
Make sure to ask permission.
Always stay in love.
Always stay in love.
For the healthcare and the tax reliefs,
The babies and religious beliefs,
Always stay in love.
Always stay in love.
Forget what real passion means;
Make sure your dirty laundry’s clean,
Always stay in love.
Always stay in love.
Focus on a single goal,
Embodying the status quo,
Always stay in love.
Always stay in love.
But don’t forget that in between
The kisses and the magazines:
Shouts should ring,
Tears should sting,
Questions fling—
Accountability is everything.
Through hard work and screwing plans
Of goals imposed by greedy hands,
A love could last a lifetime...
but if it doesn’t, then that’s fine.
Just don’t think that you should
Always stay in love.
Frye’s Fundamentals of Oppression
Armpits
So, in taking full advantage of the ability to express myself completely (by being really lazy and not shaving) I didn’t shave for about a month. Yeah, it was beyond fuzzy, and maybe it was even a little scary, but I loved it. I enjoyed knowing that no harm comes to those who do not shave. And to tell you the truth, I was really amused by the horrified looks I got from people who would catch a glimpse.
Then Madrigal came around, and my shocked and appalled girlfriends practically forced me to shave my armpits. (They wouldn’t get too close to me though). I guess that looks like I’m a failure and a sucker for peer pressure. Well, this is partially true. But there are two things I’d like to say about that: 1) I haven’t forgotten one of the first things we learned in class, which is that we exist on a continuum of “masculine” and “feminine” actions/feelings; Madrigal just so happened to be an appropriate time to squeeze into a nice dress and attempt to put on make-up…and shave my armpits (which I guess are “feminine things”), and 2) even though it seems like I was leaning toward one end of the spectrum that night, I ended up somewhere in the middle, because I wore my big brown L.L. Bean boots to the dance in protest of all the other girls who felt obligated to wear heels in below freezing weather. Like Virginia said, “It is fatal to be a man or woman pure and simple: one must be a woman manly, or a man womanly.”
Where are the American Herbivores?
Response to Times’ Article about Job Loss (and Gender Roles)
I can’t help but cringe a little bit when I read this because, even though I appreciate the joy of spending time with children, it’s just upsetting to read that it’s not so bad when a woman is unemployed because now she can fulfill her real role, aka housewife. But, god forbid, if a man doesn’t have a job, he has no identity, ruins the family dynamic, and causes his 9 year old to start pulling out her hair. Of course, these two examples are extremes, but they were reported in The New York Times! I feel like this article does a really good job of reinforcing the stereotype that men are not nurturing and need to be the bread-winners, while women have to stay at home and bake cookies for the kiddies.
Peggy's My Girl
This is one of the many gems in Peggy McIntosh’s article about white privilege and male privilege. In it, she describes her own realization that she has an unearned advantage in life because of her race. She relates this privilege to that which is experienced by men, which she has been frustrated with for many years. In an effort to start the process of recognizing and reforming her white privilege, she composed a list of special conditions she experiences which were unearned, but were taught to be experienced because of her birth, her citizenship, and because she was a “conscientious law-abiding ‘normal’ person of goodwill.”
I’d like to make my own list as well (maybe not as extensive):
1) I grew up in a safe neighborhood
2) I am assumed to be smart
3) I can listen to any type of music without being judged
4) I could probably talk my way out of a ticket
5) In general, I blend in with the crowd
6) I was encouraged to accept diversity rather than understand other cultures
7) I can apply for just about any job or internship without obstacle
8) Transportation is rarely ever an issue
9) Access to the foods I like and need is rarely an issue
10) My skin doesn’t speak for me
White Privilege and Pregnancy
Thanks Peggy
“Whites are taught to think of their lives as morally neutral, normative, and average, and also ideal, so that when we work to benefit others, this is seen as work that will allow “them” to be more like “us.” I think many of us know how obnoxious this attitude can be in men.”
I won’t write about every scenario in which I was relayed these subtleties by multiple teachers; I can certainly attest to this phenomenon. It is interesting to note though, the evolution of my education and awareness of my privilege. In elementary school I hardly remember learning about history, I just remember learning about the geography of the US and Maryland. I went to a diverse school and played with kids from all sorts of backgrounds, and never thought once about the fact that I went home to a nuclear, stable family, while some of my friends were greeted by a broken family with fewer funds. In middle school I was one of the only white kids in my grade, so I denounced my privileged background and tried to fit in with my other friends; I didn’t really think about why our lifestyles were different, I was just concerned about making and maintain friends. In high school, when I was finally introduced and cognizant of the blaring differences between my background and my friends’ backgrounds, I didn’t really know what I could do, and so I ignored feelings of guilt and confusion. Now I am in college and I have fewer superficial distractions, and I am working on figuring out what to do next.
Why Posting a Disclaimer is a Waste of Ink
…but I must admit, that video was pretty neat (and by neat I mean upsetting); I’ve never seen the transformation process of model to billboard.
When I saw this advertisement in class the other day, I was shocked mainly at the way the woman was depicted. The image is utterly disgusting; it’s basically making gang rape fashionable. What asshole in the marketing department for Dolce and Gabbana decided that this was an appropriate way to sell their brand? What model would agree to pose in this way? Who does this appeal to? The guys who get to rape the girl, or the girl who gets raped? Either way, it this ad certainly gets a lot of attention. The overarching themes in this ad are about dominance, power, and sex. Both the men and the woman are portrayed in very offensive ways. The woman, with a doll like expression on her face, seems to be unaware of the danger she’s in, and is shown as completely helpless. It suggests that women are vulnerable creatures who are meant to be dominated. One man is shown towering over her, pinning her down by her wrists. His eyes are hidden by sunglasses, but his facial expression is still clearly serious and unfeeling. The other men in the ad, who are standing nonchalantly in the background, observing the event, all appear apathetic to the situation that’s occurring. This suggests that all men are cruel and violent (and should have the same type of musculature). It’s outrageous, but not too surprising, that major companies like Dolce and Gabbana can get away with printing ads like this.
Pumping Irony
Many of their print ads appeal to the modern “masculine” lifestyle for young white males, which involves drinking, being lazy, ogling at girls, and going to concerts; these activities are recognizable and attractive. The ads are also paired with catch phrases that suggest friendliness and inclusion in that they are making fun of the things that would normally annoy or upset men, namely, the things a nagging woman in their life would do to them. The phrases are meant to make fun of different scenarios such as when a girlfriend bitches about what her partner has been up to. Jim Beam consistently shows that drinking their product provides an escape from bothersome situations like this, that only real men can understand (wink, wink). Unfortunately, this type of advertising seems to be working really well; once again advertising has successfully brushed over issues of equality and respect, and has continued to encourage the polarity of gender roles. But this time, they have an excuse; they’re only kidding, right?
Representations of Masculinity and Femininity in Advertisements
Friday, December 4, 2009
Yummy Mummies make me want to barf (but I feel bad for them too)
There is a new type of mummy around, one who embodies all that a woman should be: maternal and nurturing, but sexy and hip all at the same time. Sounds a little impossible to me. Not that moms can’t be sexy, they definitely can be. I just don’t think they should have to be sexy as defined by society, i.e. perky-boobed, flat-tummied, curvy-but-not-too-curvy, toned, and fashion forward. This is not realistic for all women. To draw from my own experience, my mom used to be tiny—I mean so tiny that even I can’t fit into her wedding dress. Then she had three kids, which I’m very thankful for. And all of us are very healthy, which I’m also thankful for. This is the case however, because my mom gained the proper amount of weight during pregnancy (for BMIs under 25, you’re supposed to gain between 35-45 pounds). Losing that kind of baby weight is very difficult, especially if you work full time. The majority of women who achieve yummy mummy status are celebrities whose job, as the media somehow forgets to point out, is to work out and look good all the time. Plus, they have such a colossal disposable income that they can afford to hire a work out instructor, a nutritionist, a stylist (and a therapist), all of whom help make yummy mummy status a reality. Of course, it’s easy to criticize the yummy mummies because you might feel jealous that they embody something you are pressured to achieve but cannot, or angry because they conform to society’s expectations. But consider that yummy mummies are caught in a double bind, just like all other mothers. Because they are youthful and fashionable, they are immediately accused of to be vain and unloving mothers whose children are probably just accessories. Conversely, if they choose not to focus as much on their appearances, then they are automatically stamped as a frumpy, boring mom. I’m glad I read the article about yummy mummies because its’ easy to forget that mothers are put under just as much pressure to possess very specific and often unrealistic characteristics as their teenage daughters.
Ann E. Cudd and Oppression by Choice
Cudd completely changed my ideas about what it means to be oppressed and how oppression is enforced/reinforced. She argues that oppression must fulfill four criteria: 1) oppression must involve some sort of physical or psychological harm; 2) oppression applies to groups that are identifiable independently of their oppressed status; 3) oppression implies that some persons benefit from the oppression; 4) oppression must involve some sort of coercion or force. I already knew about the first criterion, as well the third. I didn’t realize that to be considered oppressed, you must belong to an identifiable group. This makes sense to me, and is a logical criterion, because it allows oppression to be quantifiable. It echoes one of the conditions that is required for evolution (another quantifiable phenomenon): only populations, not individuals, can evolve. Of course, communities (groups of populations) can evolve as well, just like multiple identifiable groups can be oppressed. This is why women of minority groups experience double the oppression that white women or black men do. The fourth criterion seems fairly obvious, but Cudd brings up a really interesting point: oppression can be achieved via rational choices (that are forced to be made). She give the example of a woman who is in a relationship with a man who must decide whether she should to go to work or stay at home when they decide to have children. Both the man and the woman believe in gender equality, but they feel strongly about not putting their children in daycare. The woman ends up choosing to stay home because she knows that she will not earn as much money working as her partner would. She associates wealth with happiness (which is another story) and therefore makes the rational decision to care for her children at home so that the family will have a higher income and a better life. She is in what is called a double bind in which all of her options lead to some sort of oppression.
When Positive Thinking Is Undermining
Author Barbara Ehrenreich appeared on Democracy Now! (http://www.democracynow.org/2009/10/13/author_barbara_ehrenreich_on_bright_sided) to talk about her new book “Bright-Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America.”In it she describes her frustrations about the bizarre culture of always having a positive attitude, even when it is clearly inappropriate. Somehow, we are supposed to believe that thinking happy thoughts will translate into desirable situations. I agree with Barbara; being positive all the time can be exhausting, and unproductive. We aren’t like Wendy and the boys; we can’t just “think happy thoughts” and fly off to Neverland with Peter Pan, although I’m sure a lot of us wish that was possible. Sure, sometimes being positive is helpful and necessary. When you’re competing in a sports game or giving a presentation for class and you fumble (couldn’t resist) or make a mistake, I think it’s important to keep a positive attitude that will at least help you finish what you started. In this sense, a positive attitude can help fuel perseverance. But, like Barbara points out, Americans are increasingly encouraged to be positive and chirpy in situations that call for the exact opposite emotions. Barbara is a survivor of breast cancer, and she uses her experience to exemplify this prevailing positive thinking movement. She explains that lots of people (doctors, friends, etc.) encouraged her to have a positive attitude so that recovery would come faster. She was suffocated with pink ribbons and flowers and teddy bears. She was urged to suppress feelings of anger and replace them with uplifting feelings; people seemed to suggest that she wouldn’t get better unless she had a cheerful outlook. She writes, “In the most extreme characterization, breast cancer is not a problem at all, not even an annoyance—it is a ‘gift,’ deserving of the most heartfelt gratitude.” I think this is an interesting, albeit really screwed up, scenario that demonstrates how overwhelmingly gender roles are engrained into our society. When women are sick, they are told to be happy about it (?!) and are given pink, “girly” presents to help encourage feelings of hope and joy. How that’s supposed to help I will never understand. A lot of attention is given to breast cancer in particular because it is one of the most prevalent forms of cancer that kills women each year; however, nowhere near the amount of attention is given to prostate cancer, one of the major killers of men. There are no teddy bears and campaigns to help men cope with the fear and anger coupled with cancer. They are left to fend for themselves, while the women are encouraged to mask any undesirable feelings like rage and resentment.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Letter to Donna Kate Rushin
Dear Ms. Rushin,
Thank you for your ground-breaking, nail-biting, eye-averting, absolutely necessary honesty. Your poem “The Bridge Poem” is outlandish and elegant. I had to read it twice before I could formulate my own version of what you were trying to convey. But the fact that it made me confused was intriguing, and that intrigue converted to insight after a second look. Your poem really speaks to me, it truly moves me. I feel like I can relate to your frustrations. Do you think that’s possible? I’m just a petite white girl who’s lived outside DC her whole life thinking she understood diversity and was accepting and intentional; the same way the USDA “suggests” that Big Ag test and retest their equipment, or the way people join groups on facebook supporting efforts to stop world hunger and believe they’ve actually made an honest effort to help. On the outside, it looks nice and seems practical, but in reality, gaping loopholes exist. Like you, I feel that I lack power, and that I have expectations to fulfill. But while you are the victim of your family and political groups and 34 white individuals and more, I am the victim of myself. You feel pressure squeezing the life out of you from the outside, while I feel like I’ll burst from the pressure exerted internally. So what should I do? You tell us to, “stretch or drown, evolve or die.” I think admittance is a stretch—I am an over-privileged white girl that didn’t fully understand her privilege until she was 20 years old. Here’s another stretch: I have the privilege to be my true self without having to explain it or rationalize it to anyone, and you don’t. That is not fair. What’s next? Evolution….Well, look for another letter in 20 years.
Fondly,
Juliet
Response to Nellie Wong's Poem
Internalized oppression is the act of convincing yourself that you’re not worthy or good enough for something/someone, without being explicitly told by an outsider; you reinforce these ideas and end up oppressing yourself. I don’t think it’s humanly possible to ever internally oppress yourself without some sort of external force driving this atrophic mind set. What are some of the main institutional and structural forces that I think contribute to the causes of internal oppression? The media (TV, radio, newspapers, magazines, etc.)àresponsible for projecting the image of the status quo…relentlessly and without shame. Perhaps socioeconomic status plays a role in that it limits the places you can live and the things you can buy, which may not allow you to afford buying into the status quo. The strict categorization of gender roles exacerbates fragile souls who are struggling to figure out who they can possibly exude true maleness or femaleness without ignoring impulses, or desires. Providing support and awareness in contrast to these overwhelming forces is the idea of conscientization: the act of trying to make people aware of their own internalized oppression. There are few institutional forces that make efforts to spread conscientization (that I can think of). But there are structural forces that can help alleviate internalized oppression: communities. I would consider a community a group of friends, siblings, a family, professors, and books (literary communities).